This and That: Last Trip in Japan

While I was in Japan, my daughter had a birthday and asked that I bring her a yukata. They are basically cotton kimonos for summer and for after your bath. Of course, this wasn't the season for them so I could not find one. The Japanese do not over-market like we do. For instance, our retailers put out Halloween candy 2 months ahead. In Japan for White Day and for Valentine's Day, they only put out the goodies 2 weeks ahead! (White Day is women's Valentines Day in Japan. They have it all backwards! Women give chocolate and cards to men on the real Valentines Day. Men do nothing! On White Day, March 6th, men then give white gifts and sometimes chocolate to women. Of course they forget a lot. You'd think the retailers would guilt the men to death to increase sales!)

I still had to arrange a visit with my husband's Aunt. She is older than my mother-in-law but speaks better English because she worked as a receptionist just after World War II (during the occupation of Japan) at the Emperor's Hotel. She is well connected and has a sharp memory. She decided we should go visit relatives. So, her and her daughter came over and we started a road trip.

I love these types of trips in Japan because no one tells me anything. I have no clue as to where we are going! They amount to an interesting kidnapping. The Matsudo area is at the top of Tokyo Bay. They drove me down the right side of the bay to the Kawasaki area and the town of Kisaru. There, we met up with the daughter of a great aunt who had a kimono shop who still had some yukatas in stock. My Aunt bought my daughter and my little granddaughter yukatas.

From left to right- my mother-in-law, her sister (the Aunt), the Aunt's daughter. The women standing in back is the daughter of the great Aunt.

From there we drove a few blocks to the Great Aunt's grave to make a memorial. This was an old grave yard but the graves are so well cared for they seem new.

When making a visit or memorial at a grave site you have to do the following: wash and scrub the grave, weed if needed, buy at the office or bring with you a huge bundle of incense sticks, flowers and/or food or drink the loved one liked. Smaller cemeteries provide buckets, scoops and scrub brushes. As you wash and weed, you talk about the person and how old they were and any interesting stories. After it is clean, you lay out the food or flowers and light that huge bundle of incense. You put the incense in the little grotto to burn. Then you all pray.

Many of you reading this are fairly strict Christians and probably wonder what I do at shrines that worship gods other than mine, who employ demon statues to scare off other demons and pray to people and to other entities. When it is time to pray or wash with water or wash with smoke, I pray to my God. Its as simple as that. Since everyone is praying silently, we all just pray to our own God. My Aunt actually knew a Buddhist/Shinto prayer and said it out loud. It was like a little song or mantra that kind of drones. No one would have asked me to pray out loud because I don't know any proper Buddhist or Shinto prayers.

It was a beautiful graveyard. Right behind the Great Aunt's grave was a grave with this serene statue of a praying priest